GNAW (2008)
Reviewer: Pierre Badiola
DVD Release Date: 21st February
Rated: 18 (UK)
Director: Gregory Mandry
Cast: Hiram Bleetman, Carrie Cohen, Nigel Croft-Adams, Sara Dylan
GNAW by first time director Gregory Mandry sees the tried and true ‘Cabin in the woods’ horror idiom transplanted to a secluded cottage in the English country, where we meet six friends all looking for a weekend of fun, food and frolics. But as is always the case, something evil lurks behind those laced curtains, and something quite unkosher in the meat pies.
But even from the monotonous, hypnagogic drones accompanying the opening credits, the entire film plays out in an unceremonious, joyless manner, sleepwalking through the motions while also succumbing to every imaginable cliché one could think up given the already well-trodden premise. Together with the extremely lean runtime that barely spills over 70 minutes, it unfortunately becomes an instantly forgettable experience.
As the weekend progresses, each handily classifiable character -- the joker, the boyfriend and girlfriend, the outsider etc. -- slowly becomes aware of something more sinister in the surrounding woodlands and the nearby derelict farmhouses. As the friendly caretaker of the cottage Mrs Obadiah comes to check in on the lodgers and characters decide to wander off into the woods alone, things begin to take a turn for the worst. By that I mean the film devolves into a predictable slog.
It’s a shame given the accomplished cinematography that shows a polish beyond it’s modest budget. The performances on the other hand don’t do much to strengthen it’s paltry story. The script provides just the barebone requirements needed to flesh out the basic relationships, and the actors seem to not feel the need to yearn for anything beyond that. There is also a love-triangle/pregnancy plotline that is so unaffectedly realised it left me yearning for the killer to take a knife to the screenplay instead.
But what of the violence? The kills take a long time to build up and the pay off is rarely satisfying, usually omitting both tension in the chase and explicitness in the gore. What’s left is a vacuous repetition of characters wandering off alone and then suddenly disappearing. There is one scene designed to appease gore fans involving a pair of pliers and a tongue, but unfortunately it is immediately superseded by more unrealistic behaviour by the characters who usually cower with no real urgency or cognisance of the situation. One particular female victim seems to appear as calm as a Tibetan cow when confronted with a leather-aproned, chainsaw wielding man. That would usually be the time for you to scream, dear.
Obviously taking most of it’s cues from films like Last House on the Left, The Texas Chainsaw Massacre and HOSTEL, GNAW retains all of the typical beats, but none of the energy, humour or depravity that made those films so entertaining. Whilst it may be technically competent, I seldom see horror films this unthreatening.
GNAW's DVD features are quite impressive, with a pristine picture print and a Director's Commentary, Trailer and Making Of documentary all in tow. The DVD also has options for both Stereo or 5.1 Surround Sound audio tracks.
GNAW is out on DVD in the UK on the 21st of February.
movie rating: 1/5
visit the film's website: http://www.gnaw-movie.com/
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