DISORDER. (2015) DIRECTED BY ALICE
WINOCOUR. STARRING MATTHIAS SCHOENAERTS AND DIANE KRUGER. REVIEW BY
SANDRA HARRIS. ©
Woo-hoo! Matthias Schoenaerts, the
sexiest thing to come out of Belgium since the Brussels sprout, is
back on the big screen and guess what? He's once again wearing the
security guard's earpiece he was last seen sporting in Jacques
Audiard's masterpiece RUST AND BONE (2012),
when he was on the door outside the club where he met the girl. Not
just any girl, but the girl.
RUST AND BONE is
a truly awe-inspiring film which I was privileged to have seen in the
winter of 2015 when it formed part of the Irish Film Institute's
French Film Festival. I even met the famous director, boast boast!
Well, I didn't actually meet him as such. He introduced RUST
AND BONE to a roomful of people
but I was in the front
row, wearing my intelligent face and practically jumping up and down
with excitement at meeting (all right then, seeing!)
such a distinguished film personage.
Anyway,
it's hard not to fall straightaway in love with Matthias Schoenaerts,
a gorgeous man with soulful eyes and a huge fit body that makes his
fellow Belgian, Jean-Claude Van Damme, look like Grampa Simpson on an
off-day, haha. Not that The Muscles From Brussels isn't
a delicious dish as and of himself, but Matthias Schoenaerts is a pure hunk of
beefcake, if you'll excuse my objectifying the male body for a
moment. It's not like you guys would ever do that to us chicks...!
This
Belgian Love-God is brilliant in DISORDER, a
French language film with a small bit of English in it. He
plays Vincent Loreau, a young soldier recently returned from the war
in Afghanistan. The titular disorder is
of a Post-Traumatic
Stress nature, and it
makes Vincent edgy and paranoid. Combined with the hearing loss he's
also sustained, he's basically a big bag of nerves, popping pills for
different things and feeling hemmed-in and claustrophobic at times.
It
could have been much worse for Vincent, though. We see him visiting a
hospital for war veterans at one point, and it's full of amputees
who've lost one or even both legs and who are now facing into a tough
future. Vincent's body is intact, but his mind's a little shaken up.
Instead of being firmly anchored, it seems to feel like it's come
loose and is rattling around inside his skull. He keeps running his
lovely big hands over his shaved head (those prickly hairs look so soft,
sigh!), maybe to check that
everything's still where it should be and nothing's amiss.
Anyway,
while he's waiting to hear if the army will let him go back to
Afghanistan, he takes a job as a minder for a rich guy's wife and
son. The rich guy is Imad Whalid. He and his family live in this
fantastic huge house with a massive big garden. He hobnobs with
politicians and Ambassadors and Ministers, so at first I thought he
was a politician himself. He's not, though. Vincent figures out that
he's something a lot shadier than that. Well, if there is
any job shadier than politician,
haha.
Vincent
is left in sole charge of Whalid's wife and son for two days while
Whalid goes off to Geneva on unspecified business. Shady dealings, no
doubt. Vincent has every reason to suspect that the three of them (four if you count the Whalids' gorgeous doggy, Ghost) are
not safe, left behind all alone in the big empty house with the lights and the alarms going off
every five minutes, or so it seems. It's
enough to make anyone nervy,
that is.
And there's
something going on with Jessie, too, Whalid's wife. She seems
uncomfortable in Vincent's presence, even antagonistic at times. She may have plenty to worry about in the form of her husband's illegal shenanigans, but God Almighty! Does she have to be so surly and puss-faced all the time? She certainly seems like your typical rich man's missus. Like Carmela Soprano,
she may not be privy to the dodgiest of her hubby's business dealings but
she's more than happy to reap the benefits.
Or wear
the benefits, more like.
Jewellery and designer togs and suchlike. Not that Jessie's putting on
the style in the film, though, slobbing around in a trackie like that with her
hair all lank and hanging around her face. Vincent is drawn to the
mopey cow, though. Don't think I wasn't madly jealous about that,
haha. Where in the name of God is it all going to end? She's a married woman, after all. Even if her hubby is the shadiest thing since the invention of the patio umbrella. That's a joke, see, so make sure you laugh now...!
Matthias
spends most of the film walking quietly around the house holding a
gun. I'd be happy to look at him regardless of what he
was doing, so I didn't mind a bit. He's the strong silent type and he doesn't get much dialogue to say, either, but his handsome face is
extremely expressive and can say
what he needs it to say at any given time. He's excellent at looking
stressed and
under pressure, or faoin brú,
as
we say here in Ireland. If there was an award for this, I'd certainly give it to
him.
I was
gutted at the lack of sex in the film. No sex means no sightings of
Monsieur Schoenaerts's superb unclad buttocks (as in RUST
AND BONE), although his
magnificent man-bosoms are exposed for our delectation in DISORDER
a time or two. Buttocks are still worth more, though...!
I'm
afraid I didn't think much of Diane Kruger as Jessie Whalid. She doesn't seem to have
the likeability factor, and no, it's not because I'm jealous of her
getting to hang out with Matthias! I just plain old didn't like her,
full-stop, whereas Marion Cotillard, his female co-star in RUST
AND BONE, was immensely
likeable. Her character Stephanie has guts to spare and good humour
in the face of adversity, whereas Jessie Whalid just comes across as
a discontented rich wife with terrible dress
sense.
Musically,
there's a good pumping beat to the film and also some gorgeous shots
of the garden in the rain. I love seeing stuff like that. DISORDER
is a great film, although I have to confess that I'm biased and I
would have gone to see any old rubbish just so long as You-Know-Who
was starring in it.
AUTHOR BIOGRAPHY OF SANDRA
HARRIS.
Sandra Harris is a Dublin-based novelist, film blogger and movie reviewer. She has studied Creative Writing and Film-Making. She has published a number of e-books on the following topics: horror film reviews, multi-genre film reviews, womens' fiction, erotic fiction, erotic horror fiction and erotic poetry. Several new books are currently in the pipeline. You can browse or buy any of Sandra's books by following the link below straight to her Amazon Author Page:
http://www.amazon.com/-/e/B015GDE5RO
You can contact Sandra at:
http://sandrafirstruleoffilmclubharris.wordpress.com
